Gabe Delahaye

I'm a writer and comedian, just like everybody else.

113 notes

On being scheduled to be on one of the planes that crashed into the World Trade Center on 9/11: “If I was on that plane with my kids, it wouldn’t have went down like it did. There would have been a lot of blood in that first-class cabin and then me saying, ‘OK, we’re going to land somewhere safely, don’t worry.’” IMDB should remove everything from Mark Wahlberg’s profile and replace it with this quote.

On being scheduled to be on one of the planes that crashed into the World Trade Center on 9/11:
“If I was on that plane with my kids, it wouldn’t have went down like it did. There would have been a lot of blood in that first-class cabin and then me saying, ‘OK, we’re going to land somewhere safely, don’t worry.’”

IMDB should remove everything from Mark Wahlberg’s profile and replace it with this quote.

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    Marky Mark blinded and old Asian man, threw rocks at black children and has a Tweety Bird tattoo! How is he accepted by...
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    Mark, every time you open your mouth, you make me ashamed of my city. Can you kindly shut the fuck up please?